Negative No More | Halifax, NS

I grabbed my notebook and sat back in my chair.  With my favourite pen in hand, I made two lists:  Likes and Dislikes.  Simple Enough.

Change can be unsettling, and lately there has been a lot of it.  Changes at work, changes at home, changes all around.  I was feeling unsettled, like I didn't know what was coming next, and I didn't like it.  It took a few weeks, maybe longer, before I realized that I needed to break my mood, to figure things out.  Time to make a list.  What do I like about things right now and what don't I like.

There I sat.  Writing, writing, writing.  Luckily, my "like" list was much longer than my "dislike" list.  My eye ran down the dislike list.  I included everything, even the things you can't change and just have to learn to deal with.  That's okay.

I stopped midway through the list.  Negativity.  It hit me -- I've let all the changes drag me down.  I'm the one being negative, repeating the bad, vocalizing things that are bugging me.  Me.  Usually so optimistic, I've been in a slump, not realizing the effect I have been having on myself and those around me.

Of all the things on the list, this is the one thing I can change.  Negative no more.  It's time to stop and smell the flowers, look on the bright side, see the light at the end of the tunnel, make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.

It's time to be the person I want to be.

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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Wordless Wednesday: Love Notes | Halifax, NS

 

 

 

 

 

   

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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It's Jason's Birthday | Halifax, NS

Jason must have known I didn't have a special post written for his birthday, so he wrote one himself - and managed to make it all about me!  I am a lucky girl... K

As is usually the case, I didn’t have anything special planned to mark my birthday last year. I never consider my birthday to be a big deal and even if it falls on a weekend I rarely go out for drinks to celebrate.  When I think about it, I’m not the one who should be receiving cards and gifts on my birthday. My mother is the one who did all the work on April 5^th 1980, so she should probably get some presents and cards to mark the occasion. Do I deserve rewards for just managing to exist for another year? Probably not. But that is a discussion for another day.

I didn’t know it at the time but my 30^th birthday would be my last.  Actually, right up until the evening of April 5^th last year I was still expecting some sort of simple celebration to mark my 31^st birthday. Maybe just sharing some cake or going out for supper.  Little did I know that April 5^th would be so different last year and every year from then on.

See, last year on this day my wonderful girlfriend, Karen, found out that she didn’t have to have chemotherapy to treat her breast cancer. I got home from work around 7pm that night; Karen had met with her oncologist that afternoon - the only appointment she had that I hadn't been able to attend.  She called to tell me the wonderful news.  She was dreading having to go through chemo and knowing she didn’t have to made us ecstatic. She told me that a group of us would be going out to celebrate the news and to celebrate my birthday. But that wasn’t what we were doing. We were going out to celebrate No Chemo Day. We were going out to celebrate how amazing she had been through all the appointments and the treatments, how well she handled the surgery and how, through it all, she managed to impress us with her courage and strength.  

So, from now on April 5^th isn’t my birthday. It is No Chemo Day. Trust me, I’m in no way upset or even a tad bit disappointed that I no longer get a birthday - not only do I get to celebrate something much, much more important on this day from now on but from what I understand since I don’t have any more birthdays I will apparently stop aging. ;-)

If you are still looking for a birthday party today, I bet Colin Powell will have a nice one. Although he probably doesn’t need any more presents or money.

But if I were you I would take a minute to celebrate No Chemo Day today. And to thank Karen for making it all possible.

Happy No Chemo Day, Karen.

ILYP2,

J

You Are My Hero | Sydney, NS

Many years ago, I worked the cash at the pizza shop, Kenny's Pizza, which was just down the road from home.  There were certain perks to working there - pizza, of course.  The cooks would throw together a pizza burger for me, or if we were all hungry, they'd whip us up a pizza.  Sometimes I'd get to decide what kind we'd have (Pep and Cheese, please), sometimes I'd let them experiment and they'd throw on whatever they were in the mood for that night (hamburger, onions, salami, you name it).

On one occasion, Robbie, the cook that night, suggested I try a Hero Sandwich instead of pizza.  I scrunched up my nose and shook my head.  "I'm sure they're delicious, but nuh-uh, no thank you."   "Come on," he said, "try it, if you don't like it, I"ll make you a pizza."  *sigh* Fine.

Well...

It.was.fantastic.

What could a Hero Sandwich be, you're wondering... it is a bun with donair sauce, pepperoni, ham, salami, donair meat, lettuce, tomatoes, and cheese all nice and toasty from the oven.

So delicious.

 

Kenny's Pizza has since expanded the business and opened shops all over Cape Breton Island.  Each and every time I head home, it is the one place I make sure I go, sometimes for pizza, sometimes for a hero sandwich.  And, yes, sometimes for both.

This last trip home was no exception.  I had a late night snack from Kenny's on my first night there.  It was so good, a few days later we stopped in Sydney River on our way out of town and picked up a treat to bring back to Halifax with us.

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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That Sounded Better in My Head | Halifax, NS, Breast Cancer Survivor

Today I saw oncologist number three.  Well, technically, he was oncologist number one, but he happens to be the third (and final) oncologist who gets to give me the all clear.  He was the first oncologist I saw after being diagnosed and he started me on my road to treatment.  He was my surgeon, who took great care in making sure I had all the facts and that I made an informed decision on my treatment.

My surgery went well, my scar isn't disturbing, and Dr. P took enough tissue around the cancer to ensure it was gone!  I've seen many other doctors since my surgery and they have all commented on the great job Dr. P did.  Had he not done such a great job, I may have had to have another surgery, or my treatment could have taken a different path.  He, in essence, created a great starting point, and each doctor, resident, or nurse I've seen since then has mentioned it.

Today's appointment consisted of an exam and a little conversation about where I go from here treatment-wise.  I like to be supportive and I like to tell people when they are doing a good job, so I thought I'd tell Dr. P what a great job he did.  Confidently, I said, "For the past year everyone who has seen my scar says what a great job you did!"

In case that wasn't enough, I said it again, "Everyone who sees it says how good it looks!"

Did I mention the scar is on my breast?  Or that I didn't specify to him that it was doctors who were looking at it?  Did I notice a glimmer of confusion?  A hint of, "Oh dear, who has this woman been showing her breasts to?"

Things always sounds better in my head; perhaps I should keep the pep talks to myself.

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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Girlfriends: Jacqueline | Halifax, NS, Photographer

Two years ago, I saw a post on Bobbi + Mike's blog that I immediately wanted to steal.  Bobbi was blogging the women in her life.  What a fantastic idea and a great way to share what I love to do with people I love.  No kids, no pets, no husbands - just me and one of my best friends, we get together, grab a bite, chat up a storm, and take some fun shots.

First up - Jacqueline.  She happened to be pregnant, but that wasn't the reason for the session.  There was no reason, except that we needed to catch up.  We had a little rain, but that didn't stop us...

 

I love you, Jacqueline, and I can't wait to meet your little guy!  

Once you get him settled in at home, we'll need to have another date.

xoxo

 

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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Celebrating Canciversaries | Halifax, NS, Breast Cancer Survivor

It was just a regular day.  Get up, go to work, nothing special.  But it was special, it was a year later, a year since I was diagnosed.  My team sent me flowers.  A few of us went out for dinner to celebrate.  We weren't celebrating my cancer, we were celebrating the year.  A year of ups and downs and struggles, but a year I survived.  One year stronger.

And today?  Today I celebrate again.  This one will be a quiet celebration, no flowers, no dinner, just thanks.  Thanks to the doctors and nurses, for it was a year ago today they took the cancer.  Thanks to their skill, they got it all.

I won't be celebrating all my cancer victories.  Each step along the way was a struggle and a victory:  diagnosis, surgery, bandages come off, I stopped leaking, my scar is healing, no chemo, radiation starts, radiation ends, I feel good, life gets back to normal, my oncologists give me the all-clear!  Each step was important.  But I will forever remember December 22 (diagnosis) and February 3rd (cancer-free).  My life was forever changed on those two days.  And now I'm one year stronger...

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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