Smiling Ear to Ear | Halifax, NS

Today was the oncology appointment.  The one where I find out if I have to have chemo.  I'm going to jump right to the good news to keep you from having to wait - my oncologist does NOT recommend chemo as a part of my treatment. Yay.  Happy Happy Happy.  Great news.

But if you want to read the story...

I've been dreading chemo.  I know everyone reacts differently to whatever chemo cocktail you get, but I was fearing the worst.  The nausea, the vomiting, the generally feeling like shit.  I didn't want any part of it.  But I knew that it was likely.  I also knew that if i were going to have to go through it, I would need to prepare myself.  I began to think of it as a given, that I would be having it and I would have to deal with it.  My mind was ready for hair loss and fatigue.  I was trying to prepare myself for what may come, for pain and sores, for changes in my eating habits, for needing help, for things too scary to think of. 

This afternoon, my team and I headed off to meet with my oncologist.  We had a very long wait in the waiting room, cousins everywhere, chatting, catching up, telling stories.  I was only allowed two people with me in the meeting so we divided ourselves up and got pen and paper ready for the plethora of information.  And boy oh boy, was there ever a lot of information coming our way.

The doctor gave us all the information we would need, he asked all sorts of questions - I really wish people would stop asking me about my period! ;-) - and answered all the questions we had.  He really really really chatted us up - at one point I joked that I would tell people, "He's really good but he talks a lot!"  But he was fabulous and we lapped up all the information.

We talked about family history, diabetes, strokes, tamoxifin, estrogen receptors, clots, nausea, sores, medication, and on and on and on.  Giving information and gathering information.  He asked how I was feeling and what I thought about the procedures.  So very fabulous.

And then, about forty-five minutes into the meeting he says it:  "For your type of cancer, I do not recommend chemotherapy."  "I love you."  I said it out loud.  Oooopsy.  Luckily, he laughed.

He explained why he came to this decision and what it meant for my treatment.  To be sure, I asked him to repeat it, "You do not recommend chemo?"  "Correct."  

"I love you."  I said it again.  Ahhhhhhhhhhh, such fabulous news.  Of course, he told me if I wanted to do chemo, I still could, they would support me and get me through it as well as I could.  But for the small amount of difference it would make, he did not recommend it.

It's been hours since our meeting and I haven't stopped smiling.   Ear to ear.

xoxo

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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Potatoes, potatoes, potatoes | Halifax, NS

Since having my wisdom teeth out, my diet has consisted of liquids and soft foods.  There's no chewing allowed so I've been eating things that go in and slide right down - chicken noodle soup, tomato soup, Kraft Dinner, yogourt, applesauce, and ice cream.  That kind of stuff doesn't really fill you up.  At least, it doesn't fill you up for long!

Yesterday I decided it was time for something with a little more sustenance.  Bring on the potatoes.  Ooooey, goooey, mashed potatoes.  Talk about delicious - I will never have potatoes this good again. 

That little pat on the top?  That's just some extra fabulousness - don't judge...

 

When that big bowl of deliciousness wasn't enough, I moved on to sweet potatoes...

 

That's right.  Don't be jealous.

xoxo

 

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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I'm Wisdom-less | Halifax, NS

As I stated previously, my oncologist recommended that I have my wisdom teeth removed before beginning any treatments.  Right, because I don't have enough other stuff going on, let's throw in some dental surgery!   I first discussed this with my regular dentist, Dr. Q.  He's been after me for years to have them removed; his reasoning, the longer you wait, the more chance they'll become a problem; the longer you wait, the harder it is to get them out; the longer you wait, blah blah blah... :-)  

I have a low pain threshold - read:  I'm a wuss.  So I put it off and put it off and put it off.

As luck would have it, three weeks ago one of the wisdom teeth starting causing a problem and off I went to see Dr. Q.  He was very compassionate about my struggle and the treatments I have to go through, but thought it might be time to have the wisdom teeth removed.  He looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes and said, "I don't want to say I told you so, but... "  I laughed and shook my head, yes, indeed, he told me so.

Off I went to the oral surgeon yesterday.  Terrified.  Absolutely terrified.  I think I hide it well when I'm that terrified, or at least I try to.  After a minimal wait in the waiting room, the nurse came for me.  As we walk to the surgery room, she asks how I'm doing.  "Terrified," I squeak out.  I guess I'm done hiding it!  She gets all my information straightened away and hooks me up to an IV with some happy drugs.  I remember the dentist coming in, maybe another nurse, I heard some drilling, I remember some pulling, and being little agitated at one point.  And then it was over.  Hmmmmmm.  Done.  Easy.  Who knew.

After a short recovery period, they sent me home.  But, boy, was I high.  The night before surgery, I reminded Jason he was not to record me after surgery with all the surgical drugs in me.  But we got home and I was high and I said to him, "Oh oh oh, you should record me!!!"  Yes, I was excited.  And high.

So he did.  And it still cracks me up.  I shared this on my facebook page, not thinking I would ever share it here for everyone to see, but it's just too funny to not share it with you...

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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Practice Makes Perfect...| Halifax, NS

Practice does make perfect, it's true.  That's what they tell you when you're learning to read, when you're learning to write, when you're learning to ride a bike, it makes me a better photographer, a better writer, even a better person.

The concept is not hard to master - you'd like to be good at something so you do it over and over and over again, each time getting just a little bit better at it.  Perfect is hard to come by, some times it is even unattainable, but getting better and better with practice and patience is worth all the effort.

I've been practicing a lot this week.  Before I can begin my chemo and radiation treatments, my doctors recommended I have my two remaining wisdom teeth extracted.   Should they remain, they could cause a problem if they become infected while I have no immune system.  That wouldn't be fun!

So I've decided to practice my wisdom tooth extraction recovery in the best way possible...

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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Whew... Home Safe and Sound | Halifax, NS

We are home after the most perfect break.  
A break filled with love and sunshine and relaxation.  
It was much needed and much appreciated.  

And turtles, it was filled with turtles.  
Well, the lake on our walk was filled with turtles....

 

...Kare

email:  karenk{at}eastlink.ca

website:  http://www.karenkyte.com

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The Night Before...

Writing comes easiest to me when I'm emotional.  The words dance around in my head and snake their way into sentences.  Tonight I am emotional and there's lots of dancing going on.

Jason and I are heading home tomorrow and I so don't want this trip to end.  For so many reasons.  We have had the most peaceful, relaxing two weeks you can imagine.  We have hung out with my folks and talked about nothing, no worries, no life-altering events.  We've skirted around all that for the most part, skimming over it, but not dwelling on it.  No, this trip was to forget about it, to forget about what's to come.  And for the most part, we did.  Or pretended we did.  It creeps into my brain ever so slowly, and I smack it away again.

Until today.  There it is, we head home tomorrow and get into doctors' appointments next week.  There will be no skirting it then.  So it's in my head as I say my goodbyes to the wonderful people my parents have in their lives.  People who hug me, pray for me, and honestly wish me well.  Mom, Dad, Jason and I settle in for a final supper together (Papa John's pizza - so very delicious that we had it three times while we were here!) and it's in my head.  I want it to go away for just one more night, so I smack it away, just for a little while.

Now it's late.  We still need to pack.  Hopefully I can keep the thoughts at bay for just a little while longer...

xoxo
...Kare

I See You...

There are so many of you that have visited my blog in the last few months.  I love each and every one of the visits that I get.  Some of you come from Nova Scotia, some from Florida, and some from South Africa.  These places are where my family are located but I also see visitors from Ontario, California, Alberta, New Hampshire, and Kentucky!  And these are just a few of the places - it amazes me where you all come from.

I know some of you who visit are family or friends, some of you are friends of my family members, some are fellow photogs who happen by, and some of you end up here accidentally.  It doesn't matter to me how you got here, I'm just glad to have you.

And for those of you who come back day after day on purpose to check in on me - I thank you.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart for coming by and spending part of your day with me, for praying for me, for sending me good thoughts.  I am truly grateful.

I used to think my cousin, Shelley, was the only one reading the blog (she's faithful!) but I'm genuinely touched when someone tells me they're reading or someone reminds me of something I've posted.  Marion, thank you for the reminder tonight that people are stopping by - it's nice to know you start your day with me.  :-)

A recent camera phone picture Jason snapped while we were out for our walk.

xoxo
...Kare